Friday, September 16, 2011
Are You Kidding?
Come Wednesday PM, I was sitting in my computer science class scanning over my notes when I realized it was happening again. Blockage time for Jennie. In the spirit of being an obedient GI patient, I waited out my blockage as long as possible and survived through the night, wanting to go to classes on Thursday. But 6:30 AM on Thursday had a different story - a ‘march yourself to the ER NOW’ kind of feel, and off I went.
Pain was worse, nausea was worse, I was upchucking on myself and felt like saying to everyone, Did you think I was kidding? Frequent blockage issues really mean frequent blockage issues. The absence of any decent veins with the combination of desperate need for pain and anti-nausea medication makes for a bad time.
This post entry is not long nor is it especially touchy - but here it what I hope it is: truthful. When I was waiting for my ileoscopy earlier today, I couldn’t help but burst into streams of tears running down my face; the pain, the frustration, the uncertainty, the aloneness - sometimes it’s all too much.
I will be fine - as a good friend of mine recently pointed out, pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. And humor, well, I think that just might be a necessity.